


The Earth Laughs in Flowers

by WooziOveralls (thenightbird)



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Angst, Hanahaki Disease, M/M, Please dont kill me, also jeonghceol is like only mentioned a bit, also jicheol is one sided if you didnt figure that out by the summary, hanahaki, im so sorry, joshuas appearance is very brief im sorry about that too, theres a bit of jihan at the end
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-03
Updated: 2016-03-03
Packaged: 2018-05-24 10:32:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,597
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6150746
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thenightbird/pseuds/WooziOveralls
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“Seungcheol” Jihoon snaps his head up “You’re in love with Seungcheol-hyung.” It’s not even a question and the older looks down in defeat, giving a small nod.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Earth Laughs in Flowers

**Author's Note:**

> "The Hanahaki Disease is an illness born from one-sided love, where the patient throws up and coughs of flower petals when they suffer from one-sided love. The infection can be removed through surgery, but the feelings disappear along with the petals."
> 
> this is literally the longest thing ive ever written holy shit  
> i didnt write this much for nanowrimo last year  
> it's not my best piece of writing but please enjoy if you can and please dont kill me  
> (also writing boo's and woozi's friendship was really interesting i hope you guys like it)
> 
> thank you so much to camila for beta-ing this for me youre awesome

To say that Jihoon has been having a bad week is putting it lightly.

The boy has been producing like crazy for Seventeen’s newest album, getting little to no sleep due to both that and rehearsals for their new title song and, to top all of that, has barely been able to talk, his throat feeling constricted and scratchy and it hurts to even  _ think _ about saying anything.

He feels miserable.

It doesn’t help that Seungcheol has just officialized it with Jeonghan after months of waltzing around a possible relationship, and has been parading around with his new boyfriend all week, rubbing their happiness on everyone’s faces.

Okay, he might be exaggerating a bit.

Jihoon wasn’t thrilled about that but he was somewhat happy for the new couple. Both seemed really content, and in some aspects they did complement each other, Jeonghan’s calm personality matching Seungcheol’s more impacting one and the leader offering him a quiet kind of companionship he had only ever given to Jihoon and Doyoon before in return. Both older boys even had the consideration of never showing much skinship in front of the members - unless, of course, their intention was to gross out everyone by sitting on each other’s laps and making kissy noises.

It was enough to piss off Jihoon and his pathetic broken heart, though.

He had thought the stupid crush he used to have on Seungcheol had extinguished itself after having been developed in their trainee days, when they were placed together into Seventeen and gaining even more strength when Seungcheol pecked him on the lips after that stupid game during Seventeen TV, but, as it turns out, he had just buried his feelings deep within himself, building walls around them, only to have said walls be destroyed as soon as the words “we are dating” left Jeonghan’s lips.

As the shorter boy reprimands and snaps at all of the members during their recordings sessions, no one pays any mind to it. The other twelve boys are more than used to their producer’s constant mood bursts in the weeks leading to their comebacks, and if anyone had noticed any changes in their friend’s already bad mood, nothing has been said about it, as he hoped would happen.

But if no one had noticed before, they do when he literally runs from rehearsal clutching at his stomach.

Jihoon can hear someone running after him, but doesn’t stop, can’t stop, because it feels like there’s sandpaper going up in his throat and he silently prays for it not to be what he thinks it is as his knees hit the cold restroom tiles in one of the stalls and the contents of his stomach are emptied into the toilet.

“Hyung!” Seungkwan’s voice reverberates into the small restroom and Jihoon grips the borders of the toilet bowl tighter as he coughs out the last of whatever-the-fuck-that-was.

The younger approaches Jihoon slowly “Jihoon-hyung? Are you okay?”  _ It feels like I just puked out sandpaper, does it look like I’m okay _ is what he wants to say, but instead the producer just gives a small nod and a strained “Y-yea-” That gets cut off by another heave.

There’s a hand on his back, rubbing softly, accompanied by Seungkwan’s soft comforting whispers and, after a few minutes, Jihoon has finally gathered enough courage to open his eyes, only to have his entire being filled with dread as he sees what just came out of his mouth.

Flower petals.

White daffodils, to be more precise.

For unrequited love.

As if the fact he just puked out flower petals wasn’t enough to clarify that.

Jihoon can hear the younger boy beside him saying something, but the rush in his ears makes it impossible for him to make out the words.

He didn’t think the situation was this bad.

The tears don’t take much longer to come.

Jihoon doesn't know if he’s grateful for Seungkwan’s presence or not, because he would much rather not have anyone see him in this state, but the comforting arms around his shaking frame are more than welcome as he stains his friend’s shirt with his tears.

(Someone texts Seungkwan at one point, and it takes only a sniffle from the crying boy for him to know not to tell anyone, at least not yet, so he texts back that Jihoon had felt sick and that he would take him back to the dorm to rest for a bit.)

The older keeps whispering half sentences and  _ no’s _ between sobs, more to himself than to Seungkwan, and all the younger one can do is just hold him tighter.

\-----

The walk back to the dorm is silent, Jihoon’s mind going a thousand miles per hour and the younger boy besides him strangely quiet, and it’s only when he has settled on their couch, blanket around his shoulders, that Seungkwan finally speaks up.

“Who is it?”

The producer snaps his head up in surprise, forgetting he wasn’t alone for a moment, and mutters out “Doesn’t matter.”

“Hyung-”

“It doesn’t matter, Kwannie, h-they won’t ever love me back anyway.” He would usually snap at him in these kind of situations, but he physically can’t, body too exhausted from the puking and mind too tired from the realization that he had flowers growing inside of him to think of anything witty.

He’s met with a sympathetic hum and that’s it for the next few minutes, Jihoon staring blankly at the drama on the tv and Seungkwan making himself comfortable on the other side of the couch with a pillow hugged close to his chest before quietly asking, “Are you going to get the surgery?”

Jihoon swallows hard, feels the scratch in his throat, “I don’t know.”

“You know...It’s not as bad as they say, losing your feelings for whoever it is after the surgery.” The younger boy says, distractedly, making the other frown in confusion. Upon noticing Jihoon’s expression, he clarifies “Remember those two weeks I didn’t go to practice, when we were still trainees?”

It takes a few seconds, but realization soon dawns on Jihoon “Wait you….?” He sees the other nod “W-who was it?”

Seungkwan’s lips stretch into a sad smile as he looks away from his hyung to the TV remote in his hands “Hansol. I couldn’t stop puking out daisies. It’s the flower of innocence, you know, I thought he would love me back when he doesn't even like boys.”

Jihoon is taken aback.

“I-I’m sorry…”

“It was a long time ago, don’t worry.” A reassuring smile makes its way into the younger’s face and silence settles upon them once again, leaving Jihoon to his now once again racing thoughts.

\-----

They don’t bring it up again for a couple of weeks, minds too busy with their comeback- which goes wonderfully, the flowers in Jihoon’s body deciding to stay in place at least for that day. But, just as soon as their promotions start, his condition starts getting worse. He lies and lies to the members and the staff, saying it’s probably just the nerves of promotions, always catching Seungkwan looking at him with worry in his eyes everytime he does so.

“For how long are you going to keep this up, hyung?” Seungkwan asks one day when they’re both in Jihoon’s studio “It’s been two weeks, we need to tell manager-hyung before you get even worse.” As he had been getting everyday, the bathroom breaks going from once per day to twice and now thrice, his throat taking the toll of it all, making even the fans worried. But, of course, to them and to the members, he’s just a bit under the weather, nothing that a bit of medicine and rest can’t fix.

“What if you start puking roses? You know those are the most dangerous ones, their thorns can, like, scratch you from the inside, your laryn-” Jihoon tunes his friend’s rant out. Of course he knew roses were dangerous, he’s read about how they’re the second more common cause of death by the Hanahaki, losing only to suffocation.

He, admittedly, had been reading maybe a bit too much about it.

Jihoon had read all about the surgery proceedings, the success rate of said surgery - 99%, as it was a really simple procedure - and the rare cases in which the feelings had come back and the flowers had started growing again.

“Are you even listening to me, hyung?”

The older boy sighs “I zoned out, sorry.” There’s no point in lying “I’ve read all about the roses and the daffodils and every other possible flower, Kwannie, there’s very little you can tell me that I don’t already know.”

Seungkwan huffs out and crosses his arms “You know, this would be a lot easier if you just told me who is it you’re in love wi-”

“It’s not that simple!” The shorter boy explodes “You of all people should know that it’s not that simple! It’s not like you can magically make him love me and it’s not like you can make him break up with Jeonghan-hyung and come running to me, it’s not t-” He had started shaking, the words going from being shouted to barely being audible “It’s not that simple, Kwannie” He sniffles, blinking fast to get rid of the tears forming in his eyes- God, when did he become such a cry baby.- but the last part barely registers in Seungkwan’s brain.

_ Jeonghan-hyung. _

Oh  _ fuck. _

“Seungcheol” Jihoon snaps his head up “You’re in love with Seungcheol-hyung.” It’s not even a question and the older looks down in defeat, giving a small nod.

\-----

It happens that same night, when he’s finally decided to spend a full night at the dorm and is making his way to get a cup of water, when he hears it. The strained drawn out moan coming from behind Seunghcheol’s room door echoing in his ears.

“C-Cheol.”

Jihoon barely makes it to the bathroom in time, red carnation petals spilling past his lips and a few falling on the floor before he gets to the toilet

He can’t look at any of the older boys in the face the day after.

\-----

Making Seungkwan vow not to tell anyone about it proves to be of no avail in the end, because he ends up puking in front of everyone during one of their schedules that same week.

They’re literally about to go on the stage for the fanmeet when he feels the petals making their way up his throat. Their manager impedes him of going to the bathroom because “You’re about to go up, Jihoon, seriously.” and ends up with red petals all over his shoes and the floor.

He refuses to open his eyes as he hears the surprised gasps coming from his group mates.

Suddenly there are two hands gripping at his arms and spinning him around, his stomach churns again and he whimpers, earning a small “Sorry” from the person.

Seungcheol.

He opens his eyes slightly, seeing the older’s worried face up close and coughing out one last petal that gets stuck with saliva to his bottom lip. “Hyung…”

\-----

“Why didn’t you tell us?” Soonyoung asks when they’re changing clothes to go back to the dorm after the fanmeet - “I’m  _ fine _ , we can’t disappoint the fans so let’s  _ go _ ” Jihoon had insisted after his initial shock of everyone suddenly knowing had passed. 

The shorter male sighs “I didn’t want everyone to worry, it’s not like it’s that bad, I haven’t even puked that much.”  _ Except I have, and I didn’t want you guys to eventually find out I like Seungcheol. _

He decides to ignore Seungkwan’s glare from across the room.

“You still should to get the surgery, though, before it gets worse.” Hansol quips in from the couch where he had been almost falling asleep on Chan’s shoulder.

_ It’s already gotten worse _ , he wants to say but bites it down “Let’s finish promotions first before we have to talk about that, yes?” Is what comes out instead “I can handle it myself for a little longer.”

“If you say so.”

He’s thankful no one makes anymore questions.

\-----

Later that night there’s a knock on his studio’s door.

Jihoon had excused himself there because he wanted to ‘work on some things’

He really just needs a bit of space.

He gives the door a glare, hoping the person knocking would leave him alone, but the new round of knocks proves him wrong.

“Jihoonie?”

Oh fuck.

He groans internally at his own luck and wheels his chair to the door, opening it just a little at first, and then all the way upon seeing the cupcakes and the thermic bottle Seungcheol is holding. “What is it, Cheol?” it comes out hastier than intended and he cringes internally, but Seungcheol doesn’t seem to mind as he gives him a sweet smile -  _ oh, fuck off _ \- and raises his eyebrows slightly “Can I come in?”

Jihoon scoffs “You’re going to even if I say you can’t.” He wheels his chair backwards in place “So yeah, come in.”

The older boy walks past him and is already sitting on the spare chair besides Jihoon’s, rattling off the reasons why he came, “Manager Hyung bought us these cupcakes to celebrate the first fanmeet of this era and I offered myself to bring one for you since you just disappeared after we got back and I don’t know if you can eat it after, uh, puking those things, but yeah, here you go, and I also brought you hot chocolate that Jun made for us.” He says it all in one breath and Jihoon is suddenly reminded why he became a rapper instead of a singer in the group.

His heart aches at the thought of the older boy suddenly remembering about him and taking the time to grab him one cupcake - in what he knows was something akin to the Hunger Games - and walk all the way to their practice building to deliver it.

Why was Seungcheol so easy to fall in love with?

He realizes - maybe a few seconds too late - that he had been staring without saying anything when Seungcheol’s expression falls, the boy in front of him breaking eye contact and looking down at the treats still in his hands.

“You didn’t lick any of those, did you? I don’t want your germs.” The playful snark in Jihoon’s voice makes the older boy look up again and, after his brain having processed the joke, smile that smile that causes his eyes to get all crinkly and all of his teeth to show and Jihoon can’t help but smile back.

“I did not lick that donut that one time and you know that it was Mingyu.” The boy in front of him breaks into a fit of giggles in the last word and Jihoon can’t help but do the same - they’re fucking five year olds he swears to god.

It takes the hot chocolate almost spilling for them to stop and for the older boy to place the treats on the table in front of Jihoon, still smiling “Jeonghan helped me get these spare cupcakes.”  _ There _ is the name that makes the butterflies in the younger’s stomach die down and the petals rise up in his throat, he has to force his smile to stay on “One is blueberry and the other is cherry.”

“Thank you.” He says sincerely despite everything, grabbing the one that has blue frosting on it and taking a bite. Notices through the corner of his eye the leader observing him “What?”

“You’re not going to tell me who it is, are you?”

His chest constricts. “Nope.”

The older boy frowns before shrugging. “Alright.”

Jihoon swallows and decides to ask, “Why do you want to know?”

“I wanted to know who I should punch for not loving someone so amazing back.”

Jihoon wants to punch him.

\-----

It’s not that long after that for the roses to actually start coming.

Jihoon overhears the two lovebirds having sex twice more - and seriously where the  _ fuck _ is Joshua, he’s their roommate, he was supposed to  _ sleep _ in that room during the night- and finds himself heaving the scarlet petals and sharp thorns -  _ god the thorns _ , making him want to scream when they rip through his throat, hard enough to draw blood - straight into the toilet water right after the third.

“You can’t keep this up, hyung.” He hears Seungkwan’s exasperated voice coming from the doorway  - and fuck, he forgot to lock the door - “I already told you about the roses, if you keep this up yo- Hyung?” The younger cuts his sentence short when Jihoon starts coughing and one more thorn comes out, followed by a bit of blood that ends up on the older’s chin “Shit, Jihoon, is tha- is that blood?”

Before he even has time to register it, Seungkwan is kneeling by his side, the panic in his voice more than evident by now “How did you let it get this far, oh my God, hyung, you need to get the surgery, I’m calling the manager right now an-”

“Seungkwan, breathe” He has to say it in between his own deep breaths and it’s honestly a bit comical.

He hears the other’s deep intake of breath before a soft “Jihoonie-hyung, you need to get the surgery.”

His eyes shoot wide open and he shakes his head violently at the thought of losing his feelings, as painful as they are, towards Seungcheol.

“This is literally killing you, hyung.” It comes almost as a plea and it makes him look at the boy besides him, there is sadness and panic written all over his face and Jihoon feels a pang of guilt in his gut “Your feelings for him are literally killing you, you need to get rid of them.”

Jihoon leans back on his heels, still shaking his head “No.” It’s a simple statement and the younger boy’s tone suddenly goes from pleading to angry.

“Do you really want to die that much?”

These words really do strike him.

He doesn’t want to die.

He still has so much to do, so many ambitions.

He has his family.

The rest of the group, his friends.

Is he really going to let his feelings for Seungcheol take all of that away in the small chance the other would ever love him back?

_ Yes _ , his heart screams.

“No.”

It’s small, barely over a whisper, and it physically hurts to come out, but makes Seungkwan stop whatever speech he had started and stare at him intently, causing Jihoon to realize there are tears on his cheeks.

“I don’t want to die.”

The younger’s lips form a small smile and his eyes soften “That’s the Jihoon I know.”

“What the hell is all of this commotion about, fuck.” Seungcheol’s voice echoes in the hallway and the younger boys barely have time to react before he’s in the doorway. “Tone it down or go the fuck to slee-Jihoon, oh my god” Like lightning, he pushes Seungkwan out of the way and kneels besides him, grasping the producer’s shoulders and turning him so they’re facing each other and gripping his cheeks. His previously heavy with sleep eyes are now filled with worry and fastly scanning his face, taking in the now-dried blood on his chin, the tears still falling from his eyes, and the exhausted look on his face. The older’s brown orbs then make their way to the toilet bowl, noticing the petals and thorns floating in the water “Are those…?”

“Roses, yeah” Seungkwan is the one to answer and Seungcheol jumps a little as if he hadn’t even noticed the boy was also in the bathroom and Jihoon would honestly laugh if he wasn’t such a mess.

Jihoon hears the boy in front of him take a shaky breath “Jihoonie…..” He almost whimpers at the nickname. “Hunie, why did you let it get this far, you...You said you could handle it for a while more, this is so much worse than I thought, fuck.” There’s a hint of disappointment in his voice and the younger can’t pinpoint if it’s directed at him or the leader himself. “Fucking roses, oh my god, hand me a wet towel, will you?” That last part is not directed at him and soon Seungkwan is by his side, handing the towel over to Seungcheol.

Jihoon feels the other cleaning his face and his heart twists. “I- I thought I could.”

“You’re such an idiot.” The words come out as a chuckle, followed by the sound of the wet towel hitting the floor “Always trying to handle everything by yourself, that’s going to get you killed one day.”  _ it is killing me. _

“Hyung, should I call the manager?” Seungkwan’s voice interrupts their little moment and Jihoon is almost thankful for it because a few more minutes and he would have started sobbing.

Seungcheol opens his mouth to answer but the producer beats him to it “It’s late, we can do it tomorrow.” the effort to make his voice heard makes his throat feel like it is being sliced by a thousand knives from the inside.

“No, call him now. He just puked like ten roses worth of pointy thorns, that definitely can’t be good.” The worry in the leader’s voice warms his heart and he has to close his eyes to fight the wave of love that surges through him.

Oh, how he’s going to miss loving Choi Seungcheol.

\-----

The surgery itself goes just fine.

They postpone the fanmeet they had on the day of the surgery.The situation is explained briefly via Twitter for their fans and, albeit feeling guilty as that is his fault, Jihoon is overwhelmed by the support he’s given, several tweets wishing him luck filling their mentions, and a few angry ones too, he snickers at one that says “I’m going to punch the idiot who doesn’t love Jihoon-oppa back”.

He wakes up with Jeonghan in the room, with a book on his lap and hair pushed back in a ponytail. It’s weird, looking at his friend and not feeling the painful pang of jealously, but it’s honestly relieving. 

The older looks up briefly and does a double take, exclaiming out, “You’re awake!” Hastily closing his book and scooting the chair closer to Jihoon, eyes wide. “How do you feel?”

“I-”  _ I don’t feel jealous just looking at you so I’m pretty good so far. _ “I guess I’m okay.”

A frown makes its way into Jeonghan’s features. “You guess?”

“I mean I- I guess I’d have to see a picture of hi-them before being completely sure that the- the feelings are gone, but….Yeah.”

The long haired boy sighs out in relief. “Thank God, I was about to call the doctor and ask him why the fuck he said it was a success then.”

The thought of Jeonghan confronting the doctor rips a small laugh out of Jihoon.

He is about to say something sarcastic when he notices his friend’s behaviour suddenly go from fake-determined to nervous and the change is so sudden it takes him a moment to process what happened. “Did it….Did it hurt?” Jeonghan’s voice is small and he’s looking at his lap.

Okay.

What the fuck.

“The surgery? No, they sedated me and-”

“No, not the surgery.” Jihoon is crudely cut off and he can’t even be mad because what the fuck, he just woke up what is Jeonghan on “When you started, uh, puking roses.”

Jihoon stares at him incredulously “Of course it did, there were thorns ripping at my throat, of course it hurt, what…?” The older is still staring at his own fidgeting hands in his lap and realization suddenly dawns on the younger’s foggy mind. “Wait, don’t tell me you….”

Jeonghan furtively looks up at the door and then to the boy “I- You can’t tell anyone, please.” His voice is barely over a whisper and the younger nods, still a bit too confused from having just woken up to fully comprehend what’s happening. “I’ve been puking gardenias all week and I don’t know what to do.”

The producer’s whole heart fills with dread. “But I thought that-” He has to swallow the lump in his throat before continuing. “I thought that Seungcheol loved you back, I mean…”  _ Did I really just go through all of this shit for nothing? _

Jeonghan shakes his head and sneaks another glance at the door and what the fuck is happening, it’s too early for this kind of shit. “It’s not him, it’s-”

“Jeonghanie! I’m back and I brought the macchiato you asked for.” The older’s eyes widen almost comically as Joshua enters the room, holding two cups of coffee in his hands “It’s machine coffee, but it’s gonna have to do the trick- Jihoon, oh my god!” The last part is said in english and in a normal situation he would make fun of the american boy for it but his brain is going a hundred miles per hour and he just woke up for fuck’s sake, his head hurts. “You’re awake! How do you feel? Have you called the doctor yet?” The coffee almost ends up on the floor with the older’s excitement.

“N-no, he just woke up.” Jeonghan’s voice comes from where he has been sitting for the whole time this conversation has been happening. “I was about to call Doctor Kim.” Why does he look like a deer caught in the headlights.

Wait.

Gardenias.

Secret Love.

Jihoon’s brain starts actually processing the information Jeonghan just about threw on him and piercing things together.

Joshua.

Jeonghan is in love with Joshua.

Jeonghan loves Joshua and not Seungcheol.

He can feel his heart beating faster because why does it feel like he just went through everything for nothing when Jeonghan and Cheol had never said anything about loving each other why is he so stupid.

“Jihoon….Jihoonie, are you okay?” Joshua’s warm voice breaks through his thoughts and it’s then that he realizes he had zoned out.

“Y-yeah”, he lies. “It’s probably just the, uh, surgery after effects, I guess.”

“Let’s call the doctor so she can check you up and then you can rest some more. Okay?”

Jihoon steals a glance at the long haired boy frozen in the same position, still seeming a bit in panic. “Okay.”

\-----

Jihoon wakes up having a coughing fit.

It’s a couple of weeks after the surgery, with Jeonghan going to him for advice periodically - the older was lucky, his condition didn’t get worse as fast as his own had, the boy was still puking the flowers out less than once a day- and the boys having to promote without him, giving him so much free time he was starting to get bored of staying in the dorm so much - he was told he couldn’t walk as far as their practice building, where his studio is located, due to the stitches that were still healing.

He had even started missing his feelings for Seungcheol, as that would at least give him something to fantasize about.

He really wishes he hadn’t thought about that so much.

Jihoon had been having a dream with the older boy as he wakes up, coughing so hard his lungs burn and his chest aches. Coughing so hard that Mingyu wakes up and gets down from the bunk bed just in time to see the daffodil petal the producer coughs out on his hand.

“Hyung….” 

The rest of the words are drowned out by the loud sob Jihoon lets out.

  
_ Not again. _

**Author's Note:**

> my tumblr is kittenkimtaehyung and my twitter is @_mintsuga if you're interested  
> please comment, leave kudos and all that shit i need validation to live  
> ily all  
> (im not sure yet if im going to write a sequel ??????? i mean i really want to but it took me two weeks to be fully satisfied with this fic so if i do write one it's going to take a while, but stay tuned i guess)


End file.
